


Hourly Hunting

by Townycod13



Series: Daytime [2]
Category: South Park
Genre: F/F, connected to other fics but it can stand alone methinks, my crack ship, this is a thing now
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-28
Updated: 2018-03-28
Packaged: 2019-04-14 01:02:13
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,700
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14124750
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Townycod13/pseuds/Townycod13
Summary: Lighting can never give the spark in brown such justice. A roar without exhale cannot be heard but seen in those eyes. A slice of rage spiraled into condensed determination.





	Hourly Hunting

**Author's Note:**

  * For [panaceaa](https://archiveofourown.org/users/panaceaa/gifts).
  * Inspired by [Evening Effulgence](https://archiveofourown.org/works/14092512) by [panaceaa](https://archiveofourown.org/users/panaceaa/pseuds/panaceaa). 



> These don't have to be read in order but I /highly/ recommend giving panaceaa's fic a read(it's rlly good and I love it)!! (and maybe read mine as well if you have the time)

Humdrum offices have no place in the harsh lights of reality. There isn't a way to understand insanity without delving headfirst with a fist outstretched and rage being tested.

"You know what makes my day just fantastic?" Wendy's figures drummed the desk, eyes a far away and dangerous beast roaring beneath the surface. The mild-mannered coworker that was trapped between her and the microwave containing his hot-pocket gulped. He wasn't the sort that could survive in the wild. "When a key witness in my prosecution is a vigilante that doesn't  _ do _ depositions."

Clyde was a herbivore at heart, he couldn't have the slightest idea how to look the beast in the teeth and find the correct answers. He just wanted his cheesy warm lunch.

"That sounds rough." he ventured with that weak little pitch, he was merely lucky not to be the actual target of the beasts aggression.

"Rough doesn't even begin to cover it! If that stupid  _ asshole _ of a vigilante  _ actually _ cared about making a difference he would come forward!"

The little herbivore was shrinking away with fear, he likely recognized that it was only a matter of time before the break room was a bloodbath for the wrath of an unstoppable carnivorous force.

Leslie smiled, her own specially designed disarming smile that was guaranteed to diffuse any situation, and sauntered from her position by the water cooler to rescue the small creature.

After all, the more she rescued the more forces she would have on her side to use against the brainless beast.

"Oh, Wendy." her voice was the touch of sugary sweet that elicited the all too familiar tension, she thrived on it, "Are you saying you can't make your case without someone else's help? That's so unlike you." She added a touch of concern to her tone and watched with a sadistic joy as every muscle in the woman tensed with suppressed violent rage. Clyde, the poor sop, escaped with his hot pocket and a grateful nod. "Are you feeling alright? Do you need to take a half day? I'd be more than happy to drive you home."

" _ Leslie _ ," it was amazing how much emotion a meaningless beast could fit into one word. Leslie's insides curled pleasantly, it was the tempo to the war between them, "Thank you  _ so much _ for your concern, but I'm absolutely fine."

Surely her mouth must ache from grinding out those words. Leslie could think of quite a few better uses for it.

What a shame. The pathetic woman would never reach her full potential that way.

"Good to know." Leslie knew her smile was a touch too soft, it would drive Wendy up a wall, "I do so worry about you."

Lighting can never give the spark in brown such justice. A roar without exhale cannot be heard but seen in those eyes. A slice of rage spiraled into condensed determination.

Leslie met those eyes with an even stare and loved that those eyes spoke of the words that Wendy wouldn't, not here. She had no such restrictions though.

"You could be so much happier."

The beast within rattled against its cage at the taunt.

\--

"Is there a reason you feel the need to rile Wendy up at every opportunity you get?"

David was among the few that hadn't quite begun to offer his trust and subjugation. Leslie knew it was only a matter of time but it did on occasion irk her to hear such outright mutiny.

After all, the jungle should adore it's queen.

"I'm not sure what you mean," Leslie knew she was the picture of innocence, "I just want to be her friend. I worry about her, you know."

David rolled his eyes, it was awfully disrespectful of him, and nodded in a careless way, "Sure."

Leslie made a note to twist and turn his existence just a bit and find what particular things made him tick. This sort of insolence was always the beginning of further disrespect.

It was important that she had every possible tool at her disposal, for all the beasts faults there was no way to defeat an opponent such as her without a battalion at Leslie's disposal.

Wendy was strange like that. Formidable and foolish.

Leslie would so enjoy making her bend in the end.

"You're awfully worried about Wendy yourself," she wheedled, intent on finding a weakness, "She's an a rather special girl, wouldn't you say?"

David snorted, something in his eyes told that he'd seen through the spell and it was just a tad more disappointing than Leslie wanted to admit to, "I'm mostly concerned because now she's gotten it in her head to hunt down that vigilante and force him to testify."

This man really needed to learn his place in the hierarchy. He was a simple and boring cog in a boring spiral.

Leslie's thoughts slowed as the words caught up, "That's," she tested her words, unsure which of her tones she was using, "Dangerous, isn't it?"

That fool of a beast was pulling a ridiculous stunt. Leslie mentally calculated how long before she could leave work without making it suspicious.

David nodded and she could swear she heard 'duh' on his posture, "Yeah, which is why I think the two of you are getting out of hand."

The beat of the drum within her told her that anxiety thrummed through the body like a poison. Oh, how foolish to get caught in a simple trap by a posturing fool, she would have to put an end to whatever machinations had thrown her opponent.

Winning by default wasn't the game she played. She wanted to make the other woman bend and beg. Anything less wouldn't be satisfying.

Injury or death would be less.

Wendy had already departed the office for the evening. For the weekend.

Court was Monday.

\--

There should be categories for most things. The world was far too chaotic a force of twisting weeds and roots that curved in every which direction.

Leslie was quite lucky that she was rather good at reading those directions and categorizing them on her own. She could recognize any sort of pattern in the map of vines that made up the complications in life.

It was rare of her to get her leg caught in a root.

Yet, here she was, stuck on where precisely to take her journey next.

Clearly she had begun to push he opponent to the limit. A fantastic turn of events and she took a celebratory sip of wine to mask her own smile. It was too sincere an expression and she preferred to train her body for the perfect.

All the same, hunting down a dangerous vigilante was more likely to get the beast killed than anything else. Sure, Leslie could see the danger than hummed beneath the surface of her work-mate but that didn't mean that Wendy actually stood a chance in the streets.

She knew that Wendy wasn't fool enough to just rush out into the night but all the same, it was difficult to determine what her move was. Leslie's eyes danced through the case files to see if Wendy's next move would shine through.

The sound of her own clock on the wall brought new tones and measured the beat of her own heart. She debated adding a noise, music of some kind perhaps, to numb the sound. The even tempo of a clock could be maddening.

It echoed off the walls in the empty apartment and--she refocused her energy on the files.

Wendy had connections in the police department so it was likely that she would reach out to see if any of them had a clue. Leslie knew that she had better connections for this particular problem than the foolish beast. Reporters always knew more than the dumb cops.

For not the first time she pondered how Wendy could have missed a detail so simple but it wasn't going to help.

Asking her own connections wouldn't put her on Wendy's trail. She had to figure out Wendy's plan ahead of her and interfere subtly.

Ensure that the plan didn't go quite according to schedule. It would be debilitating more birds at a time. Chip down Wendy's spirit more while ensuring that the idiot didn't die.

Leslie was rather proud of it.

The trouble was she couldn't quite read the moves as far ahead as she wanted to be able to. She knew the journey would start at the police station, but where from there? People can't be puppeted and twisted from a distance unless the moves are precise, after all.

Her only other recourse was to get directly involved.

\--

It could be considered somewhat amazing how similarly dull a police station was in comparison to her own office.

Well, it was actually more dull, so far as she had seen there wasn't a single restrained beast in the building. Herbivores and followers.

She couldn't have asked for a better hunting ground. It helped that the cast of characters were all grumpy from working Saturday morning. She could just devour them all whole.

"May I help you?" there was something distinctly dead in the eyes of the clerk and Leslie made a note to become the man's reason for living. Those she'd given rise from despair made particularly effective followers. Terribly devout.

"I hope so," she tittered, smile a touch of anxiety and hope. Allow him to play the savior. "Have you seen my friend? Her name is Wendy Testaburger and I believe she came by yesterday?"

That caught the attention of a passing cop and he turned to her with a wide smile that she knew was all she'd need, "Oh, dude, you know Wendy?"

Ah, the world just always grew and spun at her command. What a thrill.

\--

Thrill was not the word that should be used.

Despite the pounding of organs beneath her epidermis she couldn't even convince herself she was alive for a moment.

"What the hell are you doing here?!"

Her voice died for what was the first time ever to her knowledge.

Could she see anything through the shadow of panic over her mind? It was difficult to say.

The one vision before her was the beast. Blinding and beautiful.

"I swear to god, Leslie, this isn't a game!" Wendy's fire burned with the heat of the sun and Leslie felt a bit faint in the wake of it, the sounds of previous gunshots still ringing in her ears. "Just, stay put, okay? I'll handle this."

She'd thought this was just an Italian restaurant. This was supposed to be just an Italian restaurant. She'd just been following a lead that Wendy might be talking to an informant here.

Of course she'd seen that some of the staff looked shady and the atmosphere was strange but she had  _ no reason _ to expect chaos to break loose.

There was that vigilante she'd heard about, the cause of this entire problem, subduing gunman with a flourish, and there was Wendy calmly evacuating the customers, and--

It was so fast. A flash of unrestrained rage and deadly intent and Leslie was frozen in the wake of it. In just moment Wendy would lose her life and she would never see that powerful fire again because that  _ damn _ vigilante hadn't testified and hadn't restrained all of the crooks.

It was blood-chilling. Her stomach curdled and a scream built in her throat that never escaped.

Because the beast was loose.

There was something so entrancing about it. The knife didn't scare Wendy in the least. When she was lunged at she met it head on. A well placed punch and a disarming technique that Leslie wouldn't be able to describe.

It was so strange to see a carnivore morphed into a meek rabbit in the wake of Wendy's superiority. In an instant she had the man on the ground and was whispering something poisonous at him.

Enchanting.

The beast conquered it's surroundings and there Wendy stood, a figure of absolute uncontested strength.

There were sirens in the distance and the vigilante was making himself scarce.

"Mysterion!" Wendy's call was so commanding that it caused the dark figure to pause in it's departure, "Reconsider. Do the right thing and testify. Without your witness accounts, they could walk."

The growl in the voice that returned held no malice but it was equally firm, unswayed by Wendy's command, "I told you before, councilor. I'll find your witness. It won't be me."

"So you say." Wendy returned.

That was the conclusion to the exchange. Police arrived and there was that friendly officer from the station chatting it up with Wendy like they were old friends and it was intolerable.

The beast calmly returned to behind bars like it was a chosen cage.

Leslie hated it.

\--

As though the weekend had never occurred.

A woman in a impeccable black suit, a flattering purple blouse, and heels that clicked against the ground with sort of determination that should kill lesser beings.

The jungle faded in a way that seemed more like a zoo. And here was a creature fresh from the wild with a smile so serene that none would guess.

Leslie couldn't recall if she'd ever paid much mind to the details the dressed the figure in front of her. She knew that her eyes were glued to it though and one cannot help but notice an excess of detail when so entranced.

"Good morning, Leslie." there's something victorious in her voice and it's just the double-shot of caffeine that she needed to snap out of it.

"Good morning, Wendy." she takes some joy at least that her voice appears to grate on the amazingly good mood that was flushing those cheeks and sparkling those eyes and there's an awfully breath-taking twist in the hair, allowing the midnight locks to cascade down her shoulders like silky strands of fate woven into hair.

"Good morning, Wendy, Leslie." Oh. And there's Kyle, yay. Kyle. "I heard you ended up getting a witness for the smuggling case?"

Kyle did not deserve the curve in that smile, the tales it tells of success and passion, "I did indeed. Didn't get that ridiculous caped crusader but the guy came through and found me someone who was willing to flip. This is going to be a slam dunk."

Kyle rolled his eyes, "I'll never understand the whole vigilante thing. What's the name of the guy again? Kysterion?"

They'd entirely forgotten Leslie was here. Rude.

"Mysterion," Wendy corrected lightly, "You should actually look him up. Despite my frustrations with him over the weekend I'd say he's not all that bad. If you look into his track record he actually spends most of his time doing simple stuff to help the little guy, help those that can't help themselves, you know?"

She decided she didn't care for the admiration in Wendy's voice. What relationship did she have with the guy? Clearly Saturday hadn't been their first meeting.

"That's almost cool," Kyle accepted with a shrug, "Some other time, maybe."

Kyle was so boring of late. He'd used to be something similar to Wendy, a fire beneath the simmering normality of a benign existence, and now his mind was always elsewhere. Would Wendy become like that?

Cool down and leave work on time to go see her stupid vigilante boyfr--

"What about you, Leslie? Do you buy into this entire vigilante thing?"

The question could be answered on auto and so that was precisely what she did. Face pale and smile frozen. Surely she'd said something generic that could have taken in a multitude of ways and she didn't bother to check out it'd been taken. She kept her eyes firmly away from Wendy's.

There was the little mail room girl fresh from the hospital, something to do with an appendix, making her way across the room with that sunshine smile and Leslie used her as a distraction.

Wendy and Kyle were more than happy to coo over the girl like worried parents and Leslie retreated the office. She needed to make it to privacy.

How had she made such an unbelievable oversight? How could she have been so foolish and short-sighted? The games she played required a level and clear understanding of the roots connecting the world and every little emotion within it. The people and how they felt, the sparks of happiness and displeasure, emotions that sway like the worlds true danger come to light.

And here she was hiding in a bathroom stall at a loss for words.

She could calm herself. She was an expert at remaining calm in all situations, so long as bullets weren't actually flying overhead, and this was just a small oversight. A little root in her path.

She was a predator at heart. Twisting and turning the world at her whims to bring it to it's knees.

Control. Money. Power. All the hedonistic pleasures within.

How had she missed it?

The thudding of the organ pumping her blood was such an unpleasant reminder of what she wished wasn't true.

She had feelings for Wendy Testaburger.

\--

The office click-clacked itself to normalcy.

The clock ticked like the one in her apartment but she ignored it in favor of organizing her latest case. Some boring debate over assault and harassment.

She could hear the zoo mill about as the animals all continued their routines. Clyde scarfed his hot-pocket while talking Kyle's ear off. David and Token discussed politics politely by their desks. The mail room girl greeted everyone with a smile. The--

So boring. She couldn't and wouldn't go about describing it in her minds eye. She should take an early lunch to look over the file. With any luck the day would end quickly and seamlessly.

There was a shadow over her desk.

She wouldn't look up. There was no point. She knew who it was.

Practice, professionalism, and talent supported her velvety voice into sounding just the correct pitch, "Did you need something, Wendy?" she sprinkled in just a speck of sweetness, "If you need any help, just ask."

"What's wrong."

That was unexpected.

Leslie's eyes finally moved up to the figure above her and it was certainly illegal to shift the world with eyes that bore for answers and a face so immersive. The shred of genuine concern that danced across her features elicited an internal litany of disarray within Leslie. She should sue.

"What do you mean?" she returned instead with a smile she knew should grind Wendy's interrogation to a halt with sheer frustration and distaste.

Wendy had other ideas and she was leaning closer now with eyes devouring every detail in their path and Leslie had never had any previous issues being studied but in the moment she felt it rip through her.

"You're off. You've been off since Monday. Are you sick?" her voice lowered, "Was it Saturday? Did you get injured?"

Leslie felt partially offended and a frustrating amount of  _ other _ emotions.

She knew her behavior had been perfect. There shouldn't have been a way for Wendy to even have a whiff of the internal struggles fighting for dominance within her.

But she had somehow  _ known _ .

Leslie rested her chin on the palm of her hand, "Are you actually worried about me?" she purred, "That's sweet. I didn't know you cared so much."

"I don't." Ow, that cut deeper than it should, Leslie's smile hurt under the pressure of her own determination, "But I can't ignore you if something happened. Look, we might not get along but if you need help, just let me know, okay?"

It was the softest she'd ever seen the razor edge of Wendy become, especially in regards to herself, and Leslie despised that too.

There was a rage crackling below the surface and suddenly she felt like perhaps she had a beast too. She'd never bothered to chain it,--what purpose would there be? She could use it to meet her ends-- but now she was restraining it with all of her strength.

Because it was screaming at her to close the short distance between her and an enchantress that had trapped her in a spell.

"Absolutely!" she promised, empty and dishonest, "The same goes on my end. Any time you need help, just ask."

Air escaping through pink lips and a slight furrow in between her eyebrows while brown depths saw everything so clearly and Wendy was backing away, "I was a fool for thinking of you. Fine, be like that."

Walking away was unacceptable, the blood in Leslie's veins screeched in protest and she felt an unfamiliar emotion of discontent creep at the edges of her vision. Wendy never walked away like this. She walked away with fire and determination and rage, a caged beast with fangs that tore through opposition.

Not a tired sigh and a flicker of disappointment.

Leslie frowned at her desk.

This wouldn't do.

\--

The damn vigilante again.

Leslie caught the case this time, unwilling to let it so much as touch Testaburger's desk. Wendy would get involved too deep all over again and probably end up meeting up with her little superhero crush all over again and that would be absolutely intolerable to watch.

Unluckily that meant that she had to deal with the unsavory mass of clustered stupidity that always involved cases with the caped crusader. The evidence was there but there was often quite a bit that couldn't be used due to methods it was obtained.

The man was like poison to any good case. If she ever had the opportunity to meet him in person she would be sure to give him a bit to think about. Maybe give him some nightmares of his own design.

"Ya know," and there was Clyde, leaning over a divider to eat his hot pocket over her without regard for the crumbs that scattered onto her keyboard. She wasn't sure she would ever be able to touch it again without a wince of disgust, "I think the cold is making everyone grumpy. Just the other day I was at my friends house and he got super upset out of nowhere. How was I supposed to know the light saber was a collectors edition? It's a light saber, come on man, it's mean for playing with."

Of course, Kyle had taken the day off and so now Clyde was now using her as a receptacle for his nonsensical babbles. She was starting to really hate Kyle.

The days were grinding on and Wendy, prim and perfect as ever, was typing away on some interesting case that Leslie  _ could _ have had if she hadn't actually vied for the ridiculous mess that followed Mysterion's idiocy.

Maybe she should see if she could cram the case onto Kyle. It seemed like an appropriate vengeance.

"So, what's up with you and Wendy lately?"

She'd tuned out the inanity and regretted it now, what ridiculous train of thought had led Clyde's monkey-brain to pursue that course?

"What do you mean?" she deflected kindly.

Clyde shrugged, "Well, I'm no expert, but you guys are normally at each others throats, right? And now you're avoiding each other like the plague. Just saying." he defended in the end.

"Wendy and I have always gotten along," Leslie smiled so fiercely it burned, "It must be your imagination. We've both been rather busy lately so I suppose it does appear as though we're avoiding each other."

Clyde sighed, "Damn, now I'm out twenty bucks."

Smile, Leslie, "Excuse me?"

The monkey laughed thoughtlessly, "I bet Kyle that you guys were fighting. He said you guys were too in love for that."

What.

"Excuse me?"

Rage beneath the surface of a contained beast and she would be sure to destroy both Clyde and Kyle.

"I mean, you guys are a thing, right?"

Not even the ice in her veins could still the thud of her heart, drumming with the impatient rage and confusion that consumed, "And who says we are?"

Clyde looked entirely confused, "You aren't? Oh, dude, I totally thought--sorry, dude."

"Who. Says." Leslie pressed, smile so thin that she wasn't sure it was there anymore.

"Uhhh..." the poor herbivore seemed to finally smell danger, "No one?" he ventured, "Everyone? You guys are like crazy wrapped up in each other all the time so... I mean, you know? And the way you guys look at each other sometimes? Gets awkward, I'm just saying."

Leslie had never before in her entire life truly understood the emotion known as scandalized. She felt it now. Every bit of her.

"We're not." she contained emotions from her voice, perhaps too much, "Get your mind out of your Sunday night drama's, Clyde. This is an office."

The man looked appropriately abashed but no amount of shame would allow her to consider this slight appeased.

How could they assume. How  _ dare _ they assume.

How dare they see through her facade.

Her face burned with shame long after Clyde's nervous departure.

She'd been seen through entirely by a monkey of all things.

It was so frustrating.

\--

"Heard you made Clyde cry."

Hung-over at work was not usually Leslie's plan but perhaps yesterday had been a bit too much and perhaps her wine glass had filled a few too many times.

Even without the throbbing within her skull assaulting her senses she wouldn't have welcomed the voice above her.

Wendy had never visited her desk so much previously. At least not without purpose like this.

"I did?" Leslie replied, voice distraught, "I'll have to apologize. Do you know what upset him so much?"

Wendy's lips were quirked in a strange way and she was looking at Leslie with a sparkle to her that was unfamiliar and Leslie felt smaller under the gaze.

She felt like a novel that had been read.

The beast beneath Wendy's surface would never be satisfied with something as simple as a read though and Leslie wondered if she was being further explored.

"No idea," Wendy lied, a tell that Leslie had long since identified giving her away, "I just heard you got upset with him. That's unlike you, are you alright? Do you want to take a half day? Need a ride home?"

It echoed her older words with such a taunt and she knew she had to break Wendy's pace.

Something. Anything. Whatever the woman was leading up to would likely lead to her destruction.

Leslie smiled. Stiff and untrue.

"Really? That's so kind of you! Truthfully I do feel a bit under the weather today. It would be a huge help."

That was short-sighted. She cursed herself. She blamed the beast beneath the surface.

The one that  _ wanted _ .

More time, more conversations, more barbs, more looks, more and more and more of Wendy.

_ All _ of Wendy.

Wendy did look somewhat taken aback by the response but recovered quickly, so quickly that Leslie wondered if the derailment had even been worth it.

"Alright then, I'll grab my keys and tell the boss. Pack up your stuff, okay?"

There wasn't concern in the tone. Just curiosity.

Perhaps there was still some mystery between them. Leslie could only hope.

\--

The drive was short and silent.

The drive was meaningless and quiet.

The drive was worthless and insignificant.

The drive ended so quickly because Wendy turned off the car and demanded answers.

The drive wasn't the important part because Wendy's passion and determination, beast unleashed with a voice that could not be denied and a beauty that should be worshiped stole the show.

The drive was entirely forgotten in the wake of a woman fiercely demanding answers and who closed the distance?

It was impossible to say but Leslie was a hedonist by nature and she couldn't deny herself something she  _ wanted _ , not for long.

Wendy's touch was intoxicating and she wanted more of it.

Maybe the question had been about Clyde, maybe the question had been about Mysterion, maybe it had been about the looks that she hadn't been able to keep hidden.

The question was meaningless too because the gap closed between them and she could taste cinnamon and Wendy was smiling against her lips.

Leslie loved it.

**Author's Note:**

> Panaceaa's amazing stutters is now making me /really/ love this au and I just wanna explore the Mysterion aspects more omg XD and then this happened


End file.
